SELFISHNESS

Last weekend was my last big weekend before my taper. It consisted of a 17 mile run on Saturday and a 100 mile bike on Sunday. I felt great and relieved that training was winding down. I was overwhelmed by the emotion when I got off the bike.

What happened this week, my first week of tapering, surprised me. I spent most of the week worrying about details of the trip, House's post-surgery health, work, and other things that were out of my control. On Wednesday evening, I went to bed not speaking to anyone including House. I spent all day Wednesday upset that the trip to North Carolina and everything going on currently should be about me and no one else because I am the one doing an Iron Race!

On Thursday morning, after a great swim with Snips, things came back into perspective. I was angry at being selfish. I felt stupid and petty. After a day at work in which I took care of a 38 year old with Stage 4 lung cancer, I came home and talked with House. I think all the emotion that I was experiencing was a kind of taper anxiety. Maybe I was beginning to look for excuses either not to do it or not to finish. House told me that for the next 2 weeks I need to be selfish to be ready to have the best day that I can.

I know that all the hard training is in the bank. There is nothing I can change at this point in time. Now focus on the final race prep and in 2 weeks from today I will be out there.

Waddling with 2 weeks until Beach 2 Battleship........